Df'd For A Set Time Period?

[Sketch]

I would like some thoughts on the DFing time period that seems to be almost standardized.

My nephew was DF'd for lying to protect others from getting in trouble - i don't know what the issue was, but I know he was DF'd for lying to protect them (not for being directly involved). He was 17 or 18 at the time. maybe a little older. His family literally SHUNNED him. One day, his grandmother and I asked family members just how he was doing - had he finished school, going to college, was he working, how he was doing with the situation, etc... - and they YELLED at us. They YELLED at the man's GRANDMOTHER! for asking HOW he was doing!!!! that pretty much turned me off to the whole thing.... and to most of that side of the family. I was always concerned with his well being - as even his sisters would not be in the same room with him very long.

With that short synopsis in mind, he was recently reinstated. however, his family was planning a "reinstatement party" of sorts 3 months prior to this. almost as if they knew WHEN he was getting reinstated. I always thought that repentance and forgiveness was between you and Jehovah - yet it seems that you have to pass the gauntlet of men to get "forgiveness" from Him - yet ANOTHER thing that set me off... its almost as if they don't care what Jehovah thinks - if you don't do everything they tell you to do for a year, then you're not forgiven. you're haven't repented...

King David was not removed from power for a year - and he committed fornication and had someone killed!! Do the annointed of Jehovah get more room for error than the "common man". I would think they are held to a higher standard... Who has the power to say who is and who is not truly sorry for their actions?

I guess my question is to the elders/ex-elders/those-in-the-know is why is this one year mark so important? why is it almost a standard? and do the JCs really believe they can say when someone is "sorry enough"?

[Jeshurun]

Hi Sketch

This issue goes hand in hand with what has fundamentally gone wrong with the Society. There are scriptures that deal directly with every single one of these issues, and there is an overabundance of direction that can be extracted from Jehovah's Word to deal with each individual on a just basis. The reason the Society has failed to heed those instructions is because they have decided that all of that admonishment is directed at Christendom, and they are far above it and now have their own book of the law. Unfortunately their own book is lacking in its ability to distinguish between cases, because it's flawed and created by imperfect men, so everything is "standardized".

This question lies at the core of the very reason that Jehovah must wipe the whole slate clean, scatter his sheep, and recollect them.

This is an excellent post Sketch.
Lou

[fruitage]

Hello sketch....how are you...

There has to be some kind of standard in place...or otherwise anything goes...unfortunately the standard is put in place by fallen flesh....and we know that scriptures tell us we are not even capable of directing our own steps much less the next person....and adding to this state is we are not Christ ....and can not read hearts.

We work within a flawed and fallen system until the real things come....letting love be the motivating force in our actions...and some are more mature in showing love than others...so we are longsuffering and patient with each other..knowing we are all fallen flesh.

Take Care

[DoubtingThomas]

I am aware of a situation where a judicial committe DF'd an indivdual, then reinstated him within 9 months. The elders that handled that matter received a stern reproof in the form of a letter from the society. In that letter the WTS basicly told the brothers that handled the matter, that if the wrongdoing was serious enough for the individual to be DF's, then why reinstate him so soon? The letter said if the matter wes serious enough to be DF'd for, then it should be at least ONE YEAR before reinstaement occurs. i.e. It is kinda like "company policy" (The WTS is a big corporation after all). So the elders have to kinda toe the company policy line if they want to retain their job (position as elder) and receive further promotions and compensation within the company. So that is why it is almost always one year, at the very least. The elders hands are tied unless they want to incur the wrath of BIG BROTHER. Now where the WTS comes up with this scripturally is beyond me. I believe it is just another one of our man made rules set down by man who dominates man to his injury.

[Sketch]

There has to be some kind of standard in place...or otherwise anything goes...[/b]

Hello Fruitage,

I understand that people have their shortcomings... but elders effectively take our word for it when they ask us if we want to be baptised. it takes someone 3 or 6 months to start studying and get baptised and up until they are baptised - ANYTHING GOES. If someone asks to come back, they have already approached Jehovah and asked for forgiveness. they have already (as assumably as they had when they got baptised) humbled themselves before Jehovah. It is the dealing with MEN that things get hairy.

I know there needs to be a behavioral pattern shown to men, but a YEAR? without ANY support (depending on how deep the person is embedded in the congregation).

it just seems formalized and we all know that a formalized letter of apology doesn't really mean anything.... it just a form letter. and THAT is what bothers me... i don't know...

[jammin4]

I've been disfellowshipped three times. The first time I totally left the congregation for 10 years. I returned with no conscious intent of asking for reinstatement. After about 3 months or so, one of the elders approached me to advise me what the steps were to be reinstated. The first is a written request to the elders to be considered for reinstatement. It is my opinion, then, that once disfellowshipped, the next move is up to the disfellowshipped one. I waited until about 8 months or so back before I submitted that letter. It took two JC meetings and another written request from me before reinstatement was granted. As I recall, that was 11 months after returning having been gone 10 years.

The second time, I was gone for about 1 1/2 years. I submitted my request about a year after returning, had a meeting with the elders, and then never received a response/decision.(??!!) After about another 4 or 5 months and a personal encouragement from one of the elders, I submitted another letter and was reinstated.

The third time I was disfellowshipped, it was about 3 years before I even submitted a request for reinstatement. I never left off meetings the 3rd time. But I had great difficulty forgiving myself, even though I knew Jehovah did. I was reinstated when I had my JC meeting that 3rd time.

It all depends...on your written request, your responses at your meeting (JC), and your indication of repentance and meeting attendance. At least that's my experience.

[Wanderer]

Hi all:

The time it takes to be reinstated tends to vary but usually is not less than one year. Disfellowshipping is supposedly the "worst" discipline, applicable in cases of non-repentance (not necessarily the gravity of the offence). Unfortunately, many body of elders treat disfellowshipping not as discipline (which is applied with love) but as a punishment. That often explains the unhidden glee with which the news is spread and the rather odd "we-are-better" attitude on the part of those who shun the disfellowshipped person. A poster stated above that the scriptures have enough guidelines on the matter.What comes to mind is the case of the fornicator in the Corinthian congregation. He was obviously shunned and very despicably treated by the congregation, even after he had shown fruits of repentance. It took Paul's intervention to end the man's suffering. Since discipline is to help save the erring one "from the fire" as it were, it stands to reason that the current rather extremist stance of the Society should be reviewed. Our brothers and sisters whom Christ died for should not be treated and made to feel like spiritual lepers even after they had manifested repentance.

[jammin4]

By the time I was disfellowshipped the third time, the "shunning" didn't bother me one bit. Additionally, every single time I was reinstated I had brothers and sisters come up and welcome me back and say that my continued attendance was an encouragement to them!!

I have long since come to realize the importance of keeping the Christian congregation clean in order not to bring reproach on God's name or his people. My behavior warranted df'ing and I am eternally sorry for the reproach I brought on God's name and the danger of tainting my congregation with my sinful behavior.

I pray that I will never be guilty of these things again!!

[Shibboleth]

Man I never had a reinstatement party.

[Jeshurun]

I think they should set aside one of the back rooms as a "penalty box" instead of df'ing everybody.

It would save a lot of paperwork.

[Sketch]

I'm more of the opinion that the whole being "Marked" thing should be the worst of it.... anyone who has the courage to come to the house of Jehovah should be encouraged by EVERYONE. they show KNOW that they are loved...